As you may have heard, Manchester United need to buy a midfielder.
As you may also have heard, Barcelona are looking to sell Cesc Fabregas, a midfielder.
As you may or may not have heard, Cesc Fabregas, a midfielder, has asked Barcelona to listen to any offers that might come in for him, this being a perfectly reasonable attempt on his part to pretend that he is in fact the one looking to leave, rather than the one who is being sacked off by his boyhood club, regardless of his DNA.
Doubtless you'll have formed your own ideas on whether Fabregas would be a good signing for United. Opinions here at tBB range from 'Yeah, he'd be decent' to 'No, but it would really annoy Arsenal fans'. But whatever your opinion, there is something in the English papers for you.
Think Fabregas is a busted flush who'd only hinder United? Excellent! The Guardian are reporting that United have other midfield priorities and that Chelsea, weirdly unable to buy Koke despite being based in West London, are lining him up as the replacement for Frank Lampard. This story also briefly claimed that Louis van Gaal was prioritising a striker, but that appears to have been corrected.
Think Fabregas is a fine player with Premier League experience and, at only 27, plenty of career left in him? Marvellous! The Mirror are reporting that Arsenal are completely uninterested, and that Fabregas' entourage — he has an entourage? Of course he has an entourage — are confident that United is his most likely destination this summer.
So, pick your piece, and feel good about yourself. What an obliging transfer rumour this is.