Di Maria will be fit to face Chelsea — reports

Exciting news from the Telegraph this morning. All-round genius and beautiful human being Ángel di Maria is "winning race to face Chelsea". Di Maria, who limped off against West Bromwich Albion on Monday night, is apparently "untroubled by the problem", and has been receiving treatment.

Which is good news. Apparently Michael Carrick — an unused substitute against the Baggies — is also getting stronger, and Louis van Gaal is debating whether to play him against West Ham U21s on Friday night, or keep him in reserve for the Chelsea game. But that's not really important.

No, what's important is this. Given that Di Maria's recovery program presumably consists of mostly sitting still and trying not to move anything, tBB has some issues with describing this as a "race". It's far too dynamic a word for something like this. Let's call it a sit-in protest against injury.

"What do we want?"

"Ángel di Maria to play against Chelsea, please."

"When do we want it?"

"Sunday afternoon. That's when the game is."