First, the good - Radamel Falcao starts, and Angel di Maria returns to the bench after his spell out with injury, ready to step in to save our souls. Hooray!
Secondly, the bad - Marouane Fellaini is absent with injury and our midfield consists of Darren Fletcher, Wayne Rooney and Juan Mata. Boo!
Lastly, the ugly - no Ander Herrera! The Basque terrier is also out with illness, leaving us looking very light in midfield. While Rafael is benched in favour of Antonio Valencia at right-back and Ashley Young is at left-back again. F@$%&!
That team in full, then:
Manchester United starting lineup (3-5-2): David de Gea; Phil Jones, Michael Carrick, Jonny Evans; Antonio Valencia, Wayne Rooney, Darren Fletcher, Juan Mata, Ashley Young; Falcao, Robin van Persie.
Subs: Anders LIndegaard, Tyler Blackett, Paddy McNair, Adnan Januzaj, Angel di Maria, James Wilson, Rafael.