Rooney worried by managerial rumours

The identity of the next Manchester United manager is of great concern to everybody. But where we mere fans crave nothing more than gorgeous football that stirs the soul, wins the big shiny pots, and irritates everybody else — not too much to ask, surely? — the players have a personal and professional stake in all this. Their futures hang in the balance. Which of the incoming managers will like them best?

Wayne Rooney, for example, is very concerned. Concerned that the arrival of Louis van Gaal might see him relegated behind Robin van Persie in the pecking order. Van Persie is, of course, Holland's national captain under Van Gaal, and the two are apparently of one mind when it comes to matters football.

How do we know this? We know this because the Daily Mail have been told what to write by his agent managed to winkle the story out of somewhere mysterious, and all kudos to them. This is a good line:

The England striker's fortunes were transformed during David Moyes brief reign and he was set to be named captain for next season ...

... though, as the article curiously fails to mention, United were absolutely dreadful. This line, though, might be even better.

The United frontman is believed to be worried that the situation could revert to how it was during Sir Alex Ferguson's final season in charge, when Van Persie became United's first-choice striker ...

... and Manchester United won the league. Now, we at TBB aren't PR experts, but we don't think this is a particularly fruitful angle for Team Wayne. 'Guys! Remember when I wasn't as important and we were great? Wasn't that terrible? Wasn't it much better when I was really important and we were bobbins? Who's with me? Guys? Guys?'