/cdn.vox-cdn.com/uploads/chorus_image/image/32390051/156387829.0.jpg)
*drum roll*
And the new manager of Manchester United ...
*further drums*
... according to Mark Ogden in the Telegraph ...
*slightly louder drums*
... and also according to James Ducker in the Times, which is behind a paywall ...
*faintly hysterical drums*
... to be confirmed in his job by the beginning of next week ...
*vaguely disappointed drums*
... pending a resolution of the question of Ryan Giggs's position within the coaching structure ...
*distinctly uninterested drums*
... though all sides are confident that this will pose no problem ...
*barely audible drums*
... to the extent that work has already begun on transfer targets ...
*slightly more interested drums*
... will be ...
*massive drums*
LOUIS!!! VAN!!! GAAL!!!
*trumpets, fireworks, dancers, elephants, streamers, cake, ticker tape, glitter, cheering, whooping, applause, explosions, sirens, majorettes, more cake, sousaphones, violins, cannons, trapezes, a slick guy in a suit pointing at the camera and smiling, doves, even more cake, fireballs, the massed ranks of the military marching past in perfect synchrony, acrobats, jugglers, magicians, cheerleaders, a dinosaur, champagne*
Reportedly.