United have made no move for Dortmund star

When did it become common practice for family members to get dragged into the rumour mill? We've had Toni Kroos' brother spilling the details of their fraternal, United-based chats, and now our attention turns to Mats Hummels' father.

Hermann Hummels — for that is the rather excellent name of the father of the rather defender — has been speaking to ... somebody. He's quoted in the Manchester Evening News, so it's probably them. And he has sensationally revealed that, when it comes to his son and Manchester United, nothing's happened:

I know Louis van Gaal from his time at Bayern Munich. He's not contacted me about Mats moving to Manchester though. I have heard some rumours but Mats is happy at Dortmund at the moment, and only thinking about the World Cup.

It's probably worth pointing out at this stage that Hermann was a youth coach at Bayern while Van Gaal was manager, so it's not as though he's just some random parental figure who works in, say, a bank, yet expects to be kept in the transfer loop. But still. Is he really expecting Van Gaal to ring him and ask permission? It's not like he's planning to ask for Mats' hand in marriage.

Tune in tomorrow for exclusive news from Bill Carvalho's cousin's friend's parrot.