Louis van Gaal: "I don't do anything! I earn a lot of money!"

We, your soaraway super Busby Babe, did not attend the League Managers Association's annual management conference — which this year focused on what the worlds of sport and business can teach one another about preparation — because frankly we'd rather shave our teeth.

However, Louis van Gaal did, and so did the Telegraph, and thanks to the latter we know what the former had to say. He seems to have been in good form, ranging across topics such as his methods ...

Feedback is very important, of course. But I have to say that because when I don't say that then I'm arrogant! [Laughs] I am also an innovator, and I have changed a lot in terms of preparing for games. I was the first coach who was with a notebook. Now everybody is with a notebook. I was the first coach who used video.

... his notorious philosophy ...

It takes always a little bit of time to transfer the message. I'm training in the brain — a lot of things in the brain — because football is not a sport of legs, it is a sport of brain, and tactics. So, that takes a lot of time. All the players have to sustain that process and that's not easy.

... and the way in which the job of manager has changed over his career.

I'm from a time where [the manager] did everything. Now I'm the manager and I have a sports science department, I have a scouting department, I have a medical department, I have assistant managers, I have assistant coaches. [Laughs] I don't do anything — nothing! I delegate. I delegate, and I earn a lot of money.

That last bit was a headline writer's dream, though it was presumably also a joke. More can be found over on the Telegraph's website.