Are Manchester United finally set to land Wesley Sneijder?

It's the transfer window, which in turn means it's time for the biannual Wesley Sneijder-to-Manchester United rumour. The only surprise is that it's taken this long. A variety of sources -- though seemingly none of much repute -- are linking Galatasaray's Dutch international with a move to Old Trafford, and once again we're here to absolutely debunk it.

When Louis van Gaal arrived at Old Trafford last year, one of the first things he commented on was the lack of balance in the team. It had too many attacking midfielders; not enough defensive ones. Now, wingers and centre-backs appear to be where we're really lacking. So signing an attacking midfielder -- especially a 30-year-old already past his best when he move to Galatasaray from Inter Milan a couple of years ago -- really makes no sense whatsoever.

No, Sneijder is not joining United, and no, he never will.

*prepares for an eggy face*