Don't worry, friends! The international break is here to take your minds off everything!
[extremely long pause]
Well, it's here, anyway. And 14 Manchester United's players are off around the world do sing patriotic songs, wear patriotic t-shirts and, hopefully, avoid picking up patriotic injuries. Here's where they're all going ...
United have three players in Gareth Southgate's England squad. Wayne Rooney remains the notional captain, though his starting space is no longer assured. England have a qualifier against Scotland, then play Spain in a friendly. Rooney could well be joined on the bench by Jesse Lingard and Marcus Rashford, but injuries to Chris Smalling and Luke Shaw kept them from the squad.
Elsewhere, Henrikh Mkhitaryan will possibly be playing some football quite soon: he's Armenia's captain, and they have a World Cup qualifier at home against Montenegro. Marouane Fellaini's Belgium are taking on the Netherlands — might only technically be a "friendly," that one — and then have a qualifier against Estonia. Paul Pogba is United's only representative in France's squad for their qualifier in Sweden and subsequent friendly against the Cote d'Ivoire.
Matteo Darmian, who's been pretty decent since coming back in for United, may feature for Italy in their friendly against Germany or their qualifier against Liechtenstein. Daley Blind and Memphis Depay are away with the Netherlands for a Low Countries special, facing first Fellaini's Belgium and then Luxembourg. And United have three players — David de Gea, Juan Mata and Ander Herrera — in the Spain squad for their qualifier against Macedonia and friendly against England.
With Antonio Valencia recovering from his fractured wrist, it's just United's two Argentinians, Marcos Rojo and Sergio Romero, who will be flying over the Atlantic. They have two crucial qualifiers against two of their strongest opponents, Brazil and Colombia. Might be worth looking out for.
Schedule (all times GMT)
Wednesday, November 9
Netherlands vs. Belgium, 7.45 p.m.
Thursday, November 10
Brazil vs. Argentina, 11.45 p.m.
Friday, November 11
Armenia vs. Montenegro, 5 p.m.
England vs. Scotland, 7.45 p.m.
France vs. Sweden, 7.45 p.m.
Saturday, November 12
Liechtenstein vs. Italy, 7.45 p.m.
Spain vs. Macedonia, 7.45 p.m.
Sunday, November 13
Luxembourg vs. Netherlands, 5 p.m.
Belgium vs. Estonia, 7.45 p.m.
Tuesday, November 15
Italy vs. Germany, 7.45 p.m.
England vs. Spain, 8 p.m.
France vs. Cote d'Ivoire, 8 p.m.
Argentina vs. Colombia, 11.30 p.m.