In the Mirror, there's a story covering Manchester United fans reacting to the defeat in Denmark, with the fans accurately describing the players as 'fucking shite' during chants. I didn't watch it, as I'm taking a break to reinvigorate my life and feeding my spiritual needs - based around increasing the amount of chips and cheese in my diet - but if it's anything like United have played in the last four months then yes, we were indeed fucking shite.
The Telegraph says that Louis van Gaal should be sacked now. Yes, but he should also have been sacked three months ago.
Still, some good news! Marouane Fellaini is suspected of having torn his hamstring, so at least that means United's useless clown can't pick his favourite useless clown for a few weeks at least. Just imagine, we'll have to see Van Gaal's face in May, still managing United. You can read about that injury in the Manchester Evening News.
Lastly, on ESPNFC is the rumour that Manchester United are considering a £27 million bid for Wayne Rooney from a Chinese Super League club. They'd make back (less inflation costs and wages) their original investment in Rooney, and Rooney would become staggeringly more staggeringly rich. Not that you can imagine he'd go to China, though.