Manchester United to replace David de Gea with Kasper Schmeichel

Stan Collymore is a deeply unpleasant man, as far as the evidence suggests, and yet newspapers are prepared to hand him thousands of pounds for his speculative, uninformed rot. Here he defends the useless Luke Shaw and attacks one of the best managers of all time. While it is horrible to suggest you should call him a cee on Twitter...

The Daily Mail, a newspaper that hates foreigners, women and anyone who isn't a straight, rich white man, nevertheless has a decent sports section, and the story they have today is that United will have to pay £300k a week in order to secure his signature. I can also exclusively reveal that I have a transfer story on Griezmann due to go up later, and it is of course the best thing written of all time.

Here's a story about the Marcus Rashford dive from Sunday, where Rashford dived to win a penalty against Swansea. Despite diving, Rashford said to Jose Mourinho that he did in fact not dive. Which is obviously pretty confusing.

Some good news for Zlatan Ibrahimovic, and potentially for Manchester United, because his agent Mino Raiola has said that the surgery on his knee injury was a success, and that it is not going to threaten his career. He is hardly likely to say otherwise with a contract negotiation to undertake soon, but it may mean we get a few more months of Ibrahimovic in 2018.

And in some more transfer news, Kasper Schmeichel has been linked with a move to Manchester United in the summer. He's currently at Leicester City and has won more Premier League titles than most of the United squad have, but he's hardly in the same league as David de Gea.