The increasingly wretched Telegraph newspaper has churned out some more words, and decided they are emphatically Not Premium. Here's their rundown of how Manchester United can, or can't, secure a top four finish with the games remaining.
Yesterday there was a story that Kasper Schmeichel was a target for Manchester United should David de Gea finally leave for Real Madrid. Today, we're told that Leicester City have told Schmeichel that he shouldn't be looking for a move, because he's not for sale. At least that means United can buy a better 'keeper.
According to this story in the Guardian, Luke Shaw may miss the start of next season because of a serious foot ligament injury. For the good of Manchester United, we should also be wishing that he misses much more than the start of the next season for United, and misses those games for another team.
This is a bit of a daft story, given Zlatan Ibrahimovic's career with United so far. The club are allowing him to use their facilities in order to further his recovery. As well they should, given he was injured on their time and in their employment - it's the right thing to do, and there are few people who would deny any player the chance. I can think of Newcastle who would do that, but that's it.
On ESPN, there's a story that Manchester United have approached Torino to register interest in Andrea Belotti ahead of the summer transfer window. I'll level with you - I know absolutely nothing about him, but I'm going to predict that he's better than Lionel Messi and Pele combined.
And, from yesterday, here's my story on Antoine Griezmann and Manchester United. There are some at United who believe that he could be on his way, and are preparing accordingly.