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Chris Smalling set for Manchester United exit

United's clueless central defender (well, one of them) could be on his way to Newcastle United

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Manchester United are set to accept bids for Chris Smalling. This continues the clear-out from United's miserable years, the ones that kicked in from about 2013 and still have not yet really been overcome. Yes, United won the Europa League, which was fun in itself, but merely gets the club on the bottom rung of where it really should be. It does mean that United could still be in the market for another defender this summer, though. Newcastle, and Rafa Benitez, are the patsies in the Smalling move.

Apparently Ivan Perisic expects to join Manchester United. Well, we expected to sign Antoine Griezmann, and we expected Alex Ferguson wouldn't shaft Manchester United by dealing with the Glazers first, and then appointing David Moyes second. Basically, don't expect anything, because the world is filled with extraordinary disappointment.

Hugo Lloris, France's captain (Is he? That feels right, but I'm neither sure nor willing to check) has said that Paul Pogba will prove his worth at £89m. That's probably true, as Pogba is absolutely brilliant in the right circumstances, and relatively young, but he could hardly say anything different about his international teammate.

Victor Lindelof is United's most expensive ever defender. You have to wonder if he will equal some of the more expensive recruits, like Phil Jones, Daley Blind and Marcos Rojo - those are some pretty exacting standards to meet. He went to a Chinese restaurant last night, so good for him, but he also wore trousers without socks, so swings and roundabout.

It seems like [name redacted for legal reasons, but with links to United in the past] has taught Cristiano Ronaldo even more than he usually says in interviews. Ronaldo has found himself embroiled in a tax avoidance scandal which could be cause of a criminal case. Who is that redacted name? Please don't say, we'll get sued.