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Jose Mourinho accused of Spanish tax fraud

"The money was resting in my account."

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F1 Grand Prix of Monaco - Qualifying
No, no, my dog did it
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Jose Mourinho has gone out of his way to find common ground with Cristiano Ronaldo as he tries to tempt him back from Real Madrid. Such is his commitment and nous, he organised his tax affairs in such a way that he too has been accused of tax fraud during his time in Spain. Other people would argue this was both coincidence and inevitability, given the murky methods caused by complicated tax laws, but we all know - having seen how well he prepared against Ajax - that there's more to it than that.

Nemanja Matic is keen on a move to Manchester United, apparently. The slow midfielder has been linked with United ever since Mourinho took over at Old Trafford, and he has kept in touch with his former manager since their time at the club. I cannot wait to see Matic in a red shirt, being substituted before half time.

Real Madrid head honcho Mike Poncho Florentino Perez has said that Ronaldo is 'very angry' after being accused of tax fraud, but he does not expect him to join Manchester United. This all seems like it is coming to a situation where Real kindly throw a few million at the tax man to make it all go away.

David de Gea's potential replacement, Gianluigi Donnarumma had wads of fake cash lobbed at him by AC Milan fans during an Italy under-21 match. Honestly, if I were 21 and I had the chance to earn millions more by moving to a nicer city, you would not see me for dust.

And finally, Nelson Semedo has been linked with a move to United. The Portuguese defender is both a defender, and Portuguese, and he also plays for Benfica. The Benfica Portuguese defender could then join United, at which point I may actually start to learn something about him beyond which club he plays for, his position and his nationality. It's 50-50.