Robert Lewandowksi might be sulking his way to Manchester United — reports

This particular aspect of tBB hasn't played Football Manager in years, so we might be out of touch, but is it now possible to filter prospective signings by 'Has Got A Right Cob On'? If so, we think we know where Ed Woodward gets his ideas. And just as one sulk recedes, another comes to the fore.

Robert Lewandowski, Polish striker, is brilliant. He is 28 years old, which puts him more or less in his prime, and he plays for Bayern Munich, which puts him more or less out of everybody else's reach. Unless, that is, he decides that his teammates weren't helping him score enough goals on the final day of the season, causing him to miss out on the golden boot. Then

Seriously. That's the story. Look, here's the Independent talking about it.

According to the Mirror, Chelsea are also keen and have made a serious enquiry. Presumably United are just hanging around trying to catch his eye. Anyway, Bayern are having none of it:

Bayern are not thinking about any move for Lewandowski. There are no talks with other clubs, and there will not be. If other clubs negotiate with a player who still has a long-term contract, they risk punishment from FIFA.

He's going to have sulk a lot harder, it seems, if he really wants to leave. Which he probably doesn't. At this stage, tBB wants Alvaro Morata to sign less for any goals he might score, more because it'll stop the other stories.

Coming tomorrow! Harry Kane seen choosing a Manchester tart over a Tottenham cake! It's happening.