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Anthony Martial calls out the liars

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He doesn't want to leave Old Trafford, so he says.

Previews - UEFA Europa League Final Photo by Handout/UEFA via Getty Images

If we're being totally honest, the first we heard of any "Anthony Martial wants out" rumours was this morning, when the man himself tweeted as follows:

Translated, that's "The rumours are false, Red Dot". We don't know who Red Dot is — Martial's agent? a Russian spy? — but our best investigative minds are on the case.

Anyway, following the story back leads us to some other fine investigative minds: the Daily Express and the Daily Star. Yes, the Diana-fetishists and the killer crab botherers have both reported that Martial will tell Jose Mourinho that he wants to leave. They both cite The Gambling Times.

We have never heard of The Gambling Times.

Looking at TGT's story, if that's what we can call it, we have to admit we're not entirely convinced. If we were being cynical, we might conclude that this was nothing more than an attempt to push something called The Football Index, which gives lucky people the chance to spend real, actual money betting on some kind of footballer-based stock market. Obviously, there's also a quote from some actual bookmakers as well, just in case you want to waste your money in two different ways.

Maybe Graeme Bailey's sources are solid, and his information is good, and Martial is about to face-off with his manager. But you'll forgive us for not being entirely convinced. It's a fun business, modern football. From a website you've never heard of, to the nonsense fringe of the tabloids, to a player's personal Twitter account. And now, from us to you. You're welcome.