Real Madrid want to have the David de Gea transfer sorted out this week. He should cost around £66m, assuming that Manchester United are going to let any deal go ahead. While De Gea is an excellent goalkeeper, I think I speak for everyone in existence when I say I don't care which way this transfer goes, I just want it over in the shortest possible period of time. De Gea out! For our sanity!
Chelsea seem to be the preferred destination for Everton striker Romelu Lukaku, so Manchester United seem likely to lose out. The one stumbling block is the £100m asking price that Chelsea or United will have to match. Let's be realistic, he isn't the best use of £100m for almost any team in the world.
In the Telegraph is a story that United have had one bid rejected for Alvaro Morata, and will need to meet the £78m asking price for the striker. If United do sell De Gea, then it shouldn't be too hard to figure out a deal. But then again, this is a pair of clubs that failed to sort out the transfer of De Gea due to absolutely staggering incompetence, so let's not rule anything out.
United's old boy David Beckham has got approval for a new ground in Miami. Is this interesting? No, but that's the state of the world these days, and not much is happening with anyone currently at or on their way to United. Tick-tock, Edward.
And in a final post which really summarises just how desperate we are for some content - any content - is a link on ESPNFC to the best photographs from Michael Carrick's testimonial. Yes, we really are at that point of the summer. Let's re-sign Bebe, if only to give us something to talk about.