Saudi Arabia linked with £4bn Manchester United takeover

The great thing about Manchester City being brilliant, well-funded and likely to get better is that it counts for nothing. They have had their baubles bought for them, but that isn’t the point. After years without success, any fans would like to experience winning, even if it comes courtesy of deus ex machina.

However, it is built on the foundations of anti-semitism, human rights abuse, repression and misery. It is built on modern day slavery and extreme violence. It is depressing stuff, obviously, and most City fans don’t appear to care even a little bit. They go in their thousands, if it’s not too cold out and if it isn’t a European night, and they make life a little bit worse for vulnerable people.

All this could soon be possible for United’s fans, too! United could soon step up to compete with City when it comes to rampant hatred of Jewish people, beheading and executing people, and funding terrorism across the globe. That’s because Crown Prince Mohammad bin Salman has been linked with a takeover of Manchester United.

It is not clear whether Bin Salman would get away with it after likely ordering the execution of a journalist in Turkey, but he might not see it as the perfect time. After all, football fans, players and managers have gone to bat for Qatar and Dubai happily in exchange for some shiny new players, and if he took over from the Glazers he could doubtless count on supporters on the internet to explain away any old abuse or humanitarian atrocity.

If the takeover went ahead, it would be time to cut ties entirely. The club would become an indefensible abomination, and what would be most depressing would be that most fans would likely embrace the new owners because it would mean they would get to see Neymar, Mbappe, whoever, wearing a red shirt, and there is little point pretending otherwise.