Jose Mourinho is fed up and Manchester United are not good at football

Chief clown Ed Woodward went into the dressing ground to meet his assortment of minor clowns yesterday, following the pathetic 3-2 defeat to Brighton. There’s no news as to what was said yet - you would imagine that will take a couple of days as they leak it to various friends and agents - but let’s hope Woodward took note of the fact that United’s defence let the side down after Jose Mourinho had made it abundantly clear that the squad needed new defenders. There is nobody blameless here, but Woodward cannot be allowed to have any more influence on the club.

Annoyingly, Paul Scholes is right for once. For a pundit who just sits on the sidelines and moans like a Yorkshireman complaining about the small portion of chips he’s received down south, there will be times when he alights on reasonable criticisms. He says that the squad lacks leaders. Indeed, Paul Pogba was supposed to be the captain yesterday and he himself said his own attitude wasn’t right. If your captain can’t be bothered, well, we might as well all pack up and go home at that point.

Former Bradford winger Lee Sharpe says that Mourinho is the wrong man for the job and will be gone by Christmas. Get excited to see Nicky Butt and Ryan Giggs on the touchline soon then, because surely Zinedine Zidane is not stupid enough to take the squad on as it is.

Jose Mourinho was a bit of an a-hole to a woman television presenter after the game, which is pretty tiresome stuff. Mourinho has been better behaved generally, and it will be a tedious waste of time if he reverts to his very worst stuff for the last few months of his stay here.

You can read most of his strop here. It’s all coming to an ending quickly.