As is annual tradition, we here at The Busby Babe eschew boring Manchester United season awards like “player of the year,” and give out our own prizes.
UnPlayer of the Season: Andreas Pereira
Too many turnovers on the pitch, not enough getting him out in this transfer window turnover, or whatever. You get it. He turns the ball over. He’s not it. See player ratings for more.
The “He’s a f***ing great player, Youse are all f***ing idiots” of the Year: Fred
Assuming the mantle from the 2018 winner of this award, Sergio Romero. At one point in the year, Fred was not just United’s best midfielder, but he could have been reasonably considered the most important player in the team. “Fred’s Reds” was no joke, and given that he largely kept up that form after the restart, there’s still a strong case for him to be first choice (or at least just on the brink) at the base of midfield next season. Quite a turnaround for someone who looked like a competition winner in his first season.
The Oatmeal Raisin Cookie Award for Unpleasant Surprise of the Year: David de Gea
Last chance. Sort it out, pronto.
[Editor’s note: Anyone defending oatmeal raisin cookies in the comments gets an insta-ban. They’re rubbish.]
Lee “Livin’ the Dream” Grant award: Lee Grant
What an amazing job Lee Grant has. He gets paid just over a million pounds annually to get a front row seat to every Manchester United game. They even let him on the pitch once this year! Legend.
The Can’t Stop/Won’t Stop Bleeding Manchester Red Award sponsored by Band-Aid™: Scott McTominay
Remember when José Mourinho created the “Manager’s Player of the Year” award and acted like McTominay was the first player to ever go from the academy to the first team to getting their first cap in the same year so he gave him an award despite making only five league appearances? Good times.
The Dominic Toretto ‘Sometimes it’s about more than just being fast’ Award: Daniel James
Let’s add a bit more skill to that pace next season, eh?
The You Can Be Happy At Home And At Work Award: Anthony Martial
23 goals this season and zero “Sun Exclusives.”
The “Wow, the script writers sure did a good job with my character arc this season” Award: Nemanja Matić
Jettisoned away from the team back in October right after “a senior player isn’t convinced by Solskjaer” story was dropped (curiously those comments all dried up in Matić’s absence). Came back in December just so Solskjaer could put him in the shop window ahead of a January move. Now he’s first choice and near undroppable. Has a new shiny new contract and is talking glowingly about the boss. Not sure how the writers pulled that one off.
The JP Morgan-Goldman Sachs Award for Largest Bailout: Odion Ighalo
Remember how United were trying to sign Josh King on deadline day and that fell through so they just hurried a move along for Ighalo at the very last minute because he was “available?” No, you don’t, because Ighalo ended up being a half decent signing.
The You Can Shove xG Up Your Arse Award: Mason Greenwood
10 goals on 3.7 xG letting us all know exactly what he thinks of ‘your fancy little numbers.’
The We Just Can’t Beat This Guy Award: Marcos Rojo
See Brent’s Simpsons meme that he posts everywhere because it’s the only one he knows how to make. [Ed.: Rude.]
The We Just Need Something to Complain About Award: The Fans
We do, don’t we? Insufferable fanbase.
The Busby Babe Podcast Most Criticized POTY: Andreas Pereira and Scott McTominay (Tie)
Strong, surprising, push by Bruno Fernandes over the second half of the season, but ultimately these two won out. (We didn’t actually keep track of how much time we criticized each player, but if you really want to measure that be our guest.)
Good Egg of the Year: Marcus Rashford
What a guy. We’re so proud he’s one of ours.