Madrid star "can't see himself" at United

Supercharged Welsh wing-forward Gareth Bale has, over recent weeks, been quite heavily linked with a move to Manchester United. He's being booed by the Bernabeu, Real Madrid want David de Gea, and ... er ... that's about it, to be honest. Still, smoke plus smoke equals four, right?

I can't see myself at Manchester United. In an interview recently I was asked if I was happy in Madrid and I said that I was very happy here. I have a long contract still to go, I am enjoying myself and we are winning trophies. I want to continue doing this at Real Madrid.

Ah. So what about all these reports of antagonism between him and his fans?

I feel the support of the Bernabeu. I am going to continue working to show what I am capable of doing on the pitch and so as to win more trophies.

Typical. A perfectly good transfer rumour, ruined by an interview with a radio station. Pfft.