"Frustrated" Ronaldo linked with United return ... again!

Real Madrid won 2-0 yesterday, and Gareth Bale got both goals. You might think that this would put the kibosh on any 'unhappy Madrid attacker seeks red Manchester club for good times, maybe more' stories, but oh no, you're underestimating our intrepid newspaper industry. What does Bale scoring mean? It means Ronaldo not scoring.

And what does Ronaldo not scoring mean, oh Daily Mail?

Manchester United have been linked with both a bold move for Gareth Bale or a romantic return for Ronaldo. Sources in Madrid now say of the two moves it would be a bid for Ronaldo that would meet with less resistance.

Most interesting. And why?

Ronaldo failed to celebrate his team-mate's opening goal because he was too busy lamenting his own misfortune at not scoring after failing to connect properly with a scissor kick from the edge of the six-yard area. Like the incredible sulk of old, Ronaldo could be seen throwing his arms up in the air both before and after Bale converted the rebound.

[...]

He was also frustrated when Bale scored his second goal getting the slightest of touches on a Ronaldo shot but enough to divert it past the Levante goalkeeper to wrap up the three points. And with those two goals for Bale and a string of misses from himself in what remained of the game including one sitter in injury time and weak shot from a perfect Bale cross in the first half, Ronaldo went straight down the tunnel at full time failing to go to the centre-circle to applaud supporters.

Death, taxes, and Cristiano Ronaldo looking sad one night and being linked with a possible return to Manchester United the next morning. But tBB's not buying this. Don't they know United have got Ashley Young now?