Robin van Persie hasn't played for Manchester United since the 2-1 defeat to Swansea on 21 February. Since then, while the Dutchman has laboured with an ankle injury, a revitalised Manchester United have won five on the bounce, and while Wayne Rooney hasn't looked particularly great on his own up front, the team has played the best football of their season.
Correlation or causation: either way, it's not a good look. So it's no huge surprise that today's Mirror brings news that United are prepared to listen to offers for the ailing Dutchman. There will, apparently, be no extension to his current contract, which expires at the end of the 2015/16 season, and United have already "identified targets to replace him". Van Persie, for his part, may head back to Holland to end his career.
And who's at the top of United's list? Why, it's Paris Saint Germain striker and Conan the Barbarian-a-like Edinson Cavani! Apparently. Truth be told, the story spends almost no time discussing a potential deal for the Uruguayan forward, which leads us to believe that this might not be all that substantial. But if Cavani's available — quite a big 'if' — then it would be odd for United not to be interested. Falcao's likely to leave as well, and somebody's got to fill the role of smouldering long-haired goal machine.