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Memphis Depay completes Manchester United medical

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Open wide. Say 'aaaah'.

Dean Mouhtaropoulos/Getty Images

Good news, everybody. Memphis Depay has visited Manchester United's doctors and been pronounced fit and healthy. Well, fit enough and healthy enough; these are the people that signed Owen Hargreaves. Announcing the news, Manchester United's official website really went to town:

Memphis Depay has today completed his medical at Manchester United. The Club will now work towards finalising his registration when the international transfer window opens in June.

That's it. That's literally it. No amusing anecdote, no quotes for padding, nothing. Don't they realise that we have a minimum word count to hit here? Don't they realise that if they can't give us more to work with, we'll just have to post amusing Vines of Cesc Fabregas getting sent off for kicking a football at Chris Brunt's head, even though that has nothing to do with Manchester United and really has no place on this website? Is that what we're going to have to do?

Yes. Yes it is. Booo.