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Juan Mata to leave Manchester United for Barcelona, it says here

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But why would anybody want to leave Manchester United for Barcelona? It simply makes no sense!

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Some transfer rumours can live for years. Others are born, flower and die within the space of a single morning. And though we have not yet had an example of the former -- the latest instalment in Nicolas Gaitan's move to Manchester United will be along about half-three -- but we've had a beautiful example of the latter.

Juan Mata to Barcelona!

According to the Daily Mail, "initial contact" has been made between the club and Mata's people with regard to a summer move. Mata, though happy at Old Trafford and apparently keen to succeed, apparently "harbours private concerns over the long-term direction of the club," which is an exceedingly subtle way of saying "thinks Louis van Gaal is a massive spoofer." And they can't be that private; they're in the paper.

But wait! No sooner had this been floated than it was sunk. Sky Sports's Spanish expert Guillem Balague is having none of it

Wait, what's that? You're about to cynically suggest that a 'no' from Balague is more-or-less a 'yes'? Shame on you! Besides, the Mirror reckon it's a load of toss as well.